“Never forget a defeat. Defeat can be the key to victory.”
– Coach K.
How much confidence do you have in yourself?
Do you have enough confidence to stand alone?
Larry H. Miller shared the following story in Driven, An Autobiography:
“One day in my second-grade class, my teacher, Miss Issacson, posed a math problem for her 30 students to work out on the blackboard. Row by row, we each walked to the board and wrote 5 + 0 = and filled in the answer. I was in the last row, and after completing the problem on the board I returned to my seat. But when I studied the blackboard, I noticed that I was the only kid in the class who had written “5” as the answer.Reasoning that the rest of the class couldn’t all be wrong, I returned to the blackboard and changed my answer to “0” and went back to my seat. “Why did you change your answer?” Miss Issacson asked. I explained, and then she revealed the answer.That day I learned that it is possible to be a small minority and still be right, and I learned the value of having confidence in your own abilities.”
Success will not come without any risk. Sometimes that risk may be standing for what you believe while everyone around you is telling you that you’re wrong.
When you’ve done your part to the best of your ability, trust your gut.
“Sometimes everybody else is wrong.”
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Have you ever met someone that is an honest, hard worker but they never seem to be able to get ahead in life or achieve anything of significance? Yet you watch others who don’t seem to work as hard and everything just seems to fall in their lap? Have you ever seen someone that has been extremely successful lose it all and end up with absolutely nothing, but they soon turn things around and climb back up to the top while others just can’t seem to catch a break?
As I was pondering this topic I had a voice come into my head that told me a story that I’ve heard many, many times. One of the very first personal development audio books I ever listened to was Earl Nightingale’s 1957 book, The Strangest Secret.
This is his story that kept coming to mind:
“The difference is goals. People with goals succeed because they know where they’re going. It’s that simple. Failures, on the other hand, believe that their lives are shaped by circumstances… by things that happen to them… be exterior forces.
Think of a ship with a complete voyage mapped out and planned. The captain and crew know exactly where the ship is going and how long it will take – it has a definite foal. And 9,999 times out of 10,000, it will get there.
Now let’s take another ship – just like the first – only let’s not put a crew on it, or a captain at the helm. Let’s give it no aiming point, no goal, and no destination. We just start the engines and let it go. I think you’ll agree that if it gets out of the harbor at all, it will either sink or wind up on some deserted beach – a derelict. It can’t go any place because it has no destination and no guidance.”
So many people are going through life like the ship without a crew. They have no goals or clear direction. They just react to life as it happens.
If this is you, it needs to change. If you don’t get clear about where you’re headed, you won’t get out of the harbor.
Where Are You Now?
The first thing that you need to do is be completely honest with yourself and look at where you are now. What is your current status? We are going to work to find your destination. This is your starting point
As you look at the truth of your situation, what are your pain points? Why are you here?
Do you want to make more money? Do you want more time for yourself or your family? Do you want to work on your health? Do you want to fix your marriage or relationship? Scale your business? Write a book? Complete your first real estate deal? Get specific.
Stop ignoring your truth. Stop avoiding it. This is for you, tell the truth!
If it’s, “I want to make more money.” Go deeper, don’t stop there. Maybe it’s, “I want to make more money because I’m behind on all my payments. I can’t get ahead and I’m scared.” Uncover the truth.
Where Do You Want To Go?
You need clarity to create the future you want. You need to know where you are going to point the ship to get out of the harbor and end up at your destination.
In our busy, crazy lives it can be hard to set your goals and figure out where you want to go. But I learned a method from Dean Graziosi that allows you to extract yourself from all the craziness and figure out where you want to go by looking at life from a different perspective.
Imagine that it is one year from today and you are looking back. It has been the best year of your life! What does that look like? What happened that made it the best year of your life? It wasn’t just a really good year, it was the Best Year!
You lost the weight? You made the money? You got the guy? You got the girl? You completed your first real estate deal? You sold your company?
What happened that made it the best year of your life? Think big! In The Power of Focus, Jack Canfield says, “Think big. Create goals that get you so excited you can hardly sleep at night. Life has a lot to offer – why shouldn’t you enjoy your fair share?”
You’ve identified the things that would have happened to make it the best year of your life. Now step back to today, those are your goals.
Why Are These Goals Important?
You have your goals now, but why are they so important to you?
Maybe your goal make a certain amount of money. But why? Why do you really want that?
Is it to prove something? Is it for significance? Is it so you can buy something?
Whatever it is, there’s something deeper to your reason. What’s your WHY?
In Seven Levels Deep I explained how to find your WHY.
Start with the goal you’ve identified and ask why you want to achieve this goal. Put your heart into the answer. Once you’ve identified that answer, ask why you want that answer. This takes time, it takes thought and it takes effort. But every single time you find your answer, ask ‘why’ until you’ve don’t it seven times. If you are open and honest, you will uncover the real reason these goals are important to you. Your ‘WHY’!
Your ‘why’ is going to be what drives you day in and day out to stay focused on achieving these goals. There will be days where, “I want to lose weight,” or “I want more money” won’t motivate you and keep you going. But when you’ve identified the ‘why’ behind each of these goals, that’s what will get you out of bed in the morning.
What Capabilities Are Needed To Achieve These Goals?
You know where you are. You know where you want to go. You know ‘why’ you want to go there.
How are you going to get there? Your current capabilities have got you to where you are now. What capabilities do you need to get to the next level? What capabilities do you need to achieve your goals?
Do you need a trainer? Do you need someone that understands how to market on social media? Do you need a CFO? Identify what it is you need and document it.
Once you’ve identified what you need, you have to figure out where it will come from.
Talk to a coach or a mentor. Join a mastermind group or a networking group. Whatever capabilities that you need and you are lacking, someone else already has them. As you serve others and as you network, keep this topic as a part of your discussion until you discover how you can get what you need.
If you really want to expand your network and have an opportunity to grow through the collective genius of a mastermind group, get your FREE trial membership to our Inner Circle Mastermind weekly video call.
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It was thought that running a mile in under 4-minutes was physically impossible for any human being. Until, at Oxford University’s Iffley Road Stadium in 1954, Roger Bannister completed four laps in 3:59.4. The photo of an exhausted Bannister with his eyes closed and mouth opened appeared on the front page of newspapers around the world, a testament of what humankind could achieve.
As important as anything, Bannister broke a psychological barrier with this run. This once believed impossible record only lasted for 46 days before Australian runner John Landy shaved 1.5 seconds off of his time. By the end of 1957, 16 runners had logged sub-4-minute miles. Since that time more than 1,400 runners have broken the 4 minute mile and the current record stands at 3:43.13. An impossible task until Bannister changed that belief.
Similar to the impossible 4-minute mile, breaking the 2-hour marathon (26.2 miles) was another barrier that seemed would never happen. In fact, researchers in Australia crunched marathon world records over the past 60 years and concluded that there was a 10 percent likelihood that the two-hour mark would fall by 2032, and just a 5 percent chance it would happen by 2024.
Last week, on October 12, 2019 Eliud Kipchoge ran the fastest 26.2 miles ever and broke through the seemingly impossible barrier of two hours with a time of 1:59:40. That is an incredible sub-4:34 mile pace for the entire distance.
Just like when Bannister broke the 4-minute mile barrier in 1954, Kipchoge has inspired a new generation to push their limits with what is possible.
“It is a great feeling to make history in sport after Sir Roger Bannister in 1954. I am the happiest man in the world to be the first human to run under two hours, and I can tell people that no human is limited,” Kipchoge said. “I expect more people all over the world to run under two hours after today.”
“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.”Napoleon Hill
To live the life you truly desire, the first step is to break through the psychological barriers that are holding you back. You have to believe that you can get there.
Kipchoge believed he could break the two-hour barrier. Before the event he said, “Many ideologies [have] been going that no human will break the two-hour mark but personally, I have dared to try. I am doing it to make history.” After the race he said, “there was no point that I doubted myself.”
Look around. Your biggest dreams, the life you really want is not the 4-minute mile or the 2-hour marathon. Most likely, there’s already someone that is living that life. You don’t need to wait for someone to break through that psychological barrier before you can achieve it. That barrier has already been broken.
Your first step to achieving your goals is believing you can do it.
Where do you really want to be? What are your big goals? Identify the real and the imagined barriers that are holding you back. It’s time to break through those barriers and reach your true potential! Stop believing your own lies.
Not knowing how to do it. Not seeing the path. Thinking it’s impossible. These are all excuses that you’ve told yourself. Kipchoge figured out how to run a sub-2 hour marathon, you can figure out how to achieve the life you want.
Once you really believe you can achieve your goals you need to give yourself a path to follow so you’ll be able to reach the goals you previously thought were impossible.
In May of 2017, Kipchoge came up just shy of the two-hour mark during Nike’s Breaking2 project, finishing with a time of 2:00:25. After missing the mark by less than half a minute, he created the path he needed to follow to accomplish the goal a little more than two years later. This included his training and preparation all the way through to the pace setters and water delivery during the run.
Planning is key to your success. Figure out how you’re going to reach your ultimate goals and follow that plan. But be flexible so you can adjust quickly and make decisions when road blocks appear.
“The best way to predict your future is to create it.”Stephen R. Covey
Persist Until You Succeed
If at times you get knocked off your path it doesn’t mean it’s over. Adjust and figure out how to get back on the path again. Brian Tracy said, “Your ability to persist longer than anyone else is the quality that will guarantee great success in life. Persistence is self-discipline in action and the true measure of your belief in yourself. Resolve in advance that you will never, never give up!”
The first step in your journey is to see in your mind what it is that you really want and to truly believe you are capable of achieving it. The mind is a powerful force and when you use it to create the life and the outcomes you desire, amazing things will happen.
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He’s actually inspired all of us that we can stretch our limits in our lives and we can do more than we think we can do.Patrick Sang – Eliud Kipchoge’s Coach
“…the FASTEST way to getting back on my feet is to find the right customer who will advertise for me (through word-of-mouth referrals).Julie Stoian
You’ve probably heard the Jim Rohn quote before, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
How true is this statement? If it’s true, what areas of your life does it impact?
It is true, and it impacts every aspect of your life. Your level of wealth, your happiness, aspirations and goals, health and physical condition, relationships and attitudes. I could keep going.
We want our kids to hang out with good friends that will be positive influences on them. In Surround Yourself With Greatness, Chad Lewis says, “It is vital to surround ourselves with good friends as it is for a fish to live in water, especially in our teenage years. It is critically important to our lives, our future, our health, and our safety to be around positive influences, people who don’t tempt us but rather help us make good decisions. A friend who sees the good in us and encourages us to be our best self is worth more than his weight in pure gold.”
It’s no different in our adult lives. It is vital that we surround ourselves with the right people.
“He that walks with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.”Proverbs 13:20
If the people you spend the most time with have a negative outlook on life, focus on the bad, are always blaming others for their difficulties and are generally just negative, how do you expect to be happy and have a positive approach to life?
Look at the people around you. Are they more successful than you? Are they doing and working towards the things that you want in your life? What direction are they going? Where are they going to be in twenty years? Is it the direction you want to be going? They are either pulling you up, or dragging you down. Which is it?
In Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill said, “Every man is what he is, because of the dominating thoughts which he permits to occupy his mind… We are what we are, because of the vibrations of thought which we pick up and register, through the stimuli of our daily environment.”
The people around you can elevate you as much as they bring you down. I have a business partner that always has huge goals and aspirations and always has an incredibly positive attitude towards life and the future. Sometimes when I’m faced with difficulties and things just aren’t working out, I’ll go meet with him just for the pep talk. I know that just by spending time with him and talking with him I’ll leave with a positive attitude ready and excited to take on the world!
Who do you want to be? What goals do you have?
Are you getting closer to your goals or do you seem to keep running into obstacles that are holding you back?
Now, who are the five people that you currently spend the most time with? Do these people match who you want to be in the future?
Who are the top five people who embody the qualities you desire, or have done the things you are aspiring towards? How can you increase your contact with them?
You want those you spend time with to encourage and support you. You want them to help you achieve your goals. If you’re always the smartest, strongest, richest, whatever-est person in your group, you are in the wrong group. You need someone to motivate and inspire you to get better. To make you think bigger and believe it is possible.
It’s amazing the impact people can have in your life through their example, encouragement and belief in you. Just be honest with yourself as you look around and recognize if your relationships are empowering you and helping you to achieve your dreams.
The #1 thing that transformed my life was being a part of masterminds… I’ve literally invested hundreds of thousands of dollars in masterminds and it’s what’s allowed me to achieve a level of success I never though possible… Generating millions of dollars.”Dean Graziosi
If you’re ready to take your life and business to the next level, you must join use for an upcoming Inner Circle Mastermind call!
The Inner Circle Mastermind is a weekly call that has a number of components to it. We have specific topics we train on. As a group we study and discuss books and how the things taught in each book can impact our businesses and lives. As a group we break down challenges or opportunities others are facing and determine the best plan of action to move forward.
You’re The Average Of The Five People You Spend The Most Time WithJim Rohn
If you’re looking for success you need to surround yourself with like-minded, success-focused people. The Inner Circle Mastermind is a group of individuals READY FOR MASSIVE SHIFTS IN THEIR LIVES! They are READY TO STEP IT UP AND BE CHALLENGED, and they are READY TO HOLD YOU ACCOUNTABLE to do the same!
Just finished our mastermind. I now have actionable plans that will move my business forward. Thank you for creating a group of synergistic, like-minded leaders. The ideas and group brain storming put me light years ahead.
Dr. Mark Leonard – High Performance Coach
Great investment of my personal time. Jeff was able to deliver a thought provoking, systematic approach to recognizing and understanding my WHY and how to improve. Application of this in a mastermind group setting offered greater insights and perspectives to my personal and business challenges.
Worthwhile at every level!
Sheldon McLachlan – Entrepreneur
Time well spent! If you’re stuck in your life or business, Jeff will teach and guide you through the skills necessary to break through those barriers and carry you to the next level.
Alan Wood – Sales Executive
I knew this mastermind class would be beneficial but the unexpected a-ha moments were life changing. Thank you for your ability to guide us through this process so seamlessly and for helping us see so much potential in our businesses once again!
Becky Leonard – Entrepreneur
One of the hard parts about being an entrepreneur is the psychological weight of being the key decision-maker. Every decision and metric depends on you.
Figuring out how to organize your time, stay accountable, and make everything happen without losing your mind is a real challenge. I don’t say this lightly: Not having people to talk to and bounce ideas around with can be one of the hardest parts of starting your own business.
For that reason, many entrepreneurs I know turn to mastermind accountability groups to help them stay focused and successful.Sarah Kathleen Pack (Forbes.com)
“When you are at a panic point in life, who you surround yourself with MATTERS.”Stacy Martino
“…the false thinking that any amount of reading, watching videos, browsing social media, or going through courses will get me out of my situation… the ONLY way out is for me to take action like crazy!”Dana Derricks
In the talent hotbeds I visited, the chunking takes place in three dimensions. First, the participants look at the task as a whole – as one big chunk, the mega circuit. Second, they divide it into its smallest possible chunks. Third, they play with time, slowing the action down then speeding it up, to learn the inner architecture.
“There’s no higher-leverage skill a marketer can devote time to than that of storytelling.”– Stephen Larsen
How do you perform under pressure? How do you perform under emotional pressure? When something goes wrong, you’ve failed, how do you react?
As a basketball coach I have to admit that I have had experiences when things were not going right and things got emotional, and I didn’t respond in the best way. If a referee makes a bad call in a basketball game that has a negative impact on my team at a key point in the game, will it make things better for us if I lose my mind on the ref? Is there a chance if I scream and yell that maybe he will apologize and change his call? Of course not.
But on the other hand what negative could come from it? To begin with, that negative emotion is absorbed by my team. I’m showing my team, through my actions, what is acceptable. The referee isn’t going to be looking to give me any breaks or do me any favors going forward, maybe even beyond this one game.
I’m not writing this to talk about basketball referees and how you should react if they make a call you don’t agree with. What I want to look at is how we can take all of our experiences, both good and bad, and learn from them so that when we face a similar circumstance in the future we will be prepared to deal with it in the best possible way.
Whether we are in a team environment or as an individual we can look at both our good and bad experiences and learn from them. In both cases there are emotions tied to the experience that we need to be able to work around. In a positive outcome we may be flooded with positive emotions that give us the false belief that everything went right and we don’t have to think anymore about it. In a negative outcome you may feel that nothing went right and you don’t even want to think about it anymore. But the reality is that we have much to learn from both outcomes that can transform our futures.
As an individual, as a family, as a business or as a team this is an exercise that could have a major impact on your future outcomes.
After an event, either positive or negative, take the time to learn from it. Capture what the situation was, what are the facts? What about it wasn’t great and could get better? What worked? Strategize about how to make sure it happens for the better next time.
Dan Sullivan talks about “The Greatest Teacher” in his podcast INSIDE Strategic Coach. He suggests making three small boxes on a piece of paper to work through the situation:
- What Worked – This should open the flood gates and allow everyone to appreciate the there were things that worked
- What Needs to Improve – Here you can identify the problems, the things that didn’t work, so that you can improve on them for the future
- Strategies for the Future – This will make you alert to all situations in the future. You may not have an identical situation, but by going through this exercise you will be aware of how you can apply this experience to others situations in the future
Dan says that by going through this process you can create a positive momentum for the future and not be bogged down by the past.
In my basketball example I have two opportunities to go through this. First I could sit down with my assistant coaches and have a discussion and secondly I could go through the process with my team. This would allow us to look at the situation and the outcome. It would allow us as coaches and as a team to strategies on how we would react to a similar situation in the future which will hopefully bring us a better outcome.
Today in the entrepreneurial world failure is often looked at almost as a badge of honor. We hear the quotes:
“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again”
“Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of success”
“Failure is the key to success; each mistake teaches us something”
The last quote in this list is key because for anything good to come out of failure, we have to learn from our mistakes. Otherwise, failure is just failure.
As I have mentioned earlier, this is an exercise that should be used after both successful and unsuccessful outcomes so that we can learn from each of them. But this is an exercise that will allow us to look at our failures to learn from them so that we can be successful in the future.
“Your experience when you’re having intense [positive or negative] emotions is the greatest teacher you can possibly have. Channel it and you’ll always come up with amazing breakthroughs.”– Dan Sullivan
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Making a 22 hour drive from Southern Alberta to Arizona gives me plenty of time to think, and listen to audio books. Fortunately, this time I’m not alone on the trip so my wife has shared the driving, which gives me time to work and write.
While I was in Canada we were spending time with family and I had a chance to visit with a nephew who had asked me to suggest some good books for him to read. We were talking about the different books and he shared a few with me that he had enjoyed that I hadn’t read yet. One of them was Smarter Faster Better by Charles Duhigg. So this is one of the books I have been listening to on my trip home.
There are many intriguing thoughts and stories in this book, but something that really caught my attention was in his chapter on Innovation when he talked about Innovation Brokers or Idea Brokers. The reason this was so interesting to me is because I have been spending a lot of time recently preparing for an upcoming Mastermind Group, and the ideas he shared help to explain how and why a mastermind group works so well.
In his book, Duhigg refers to the work of Ronald Burt in a 2004 study he conducted. Burt conducted a study with a large number of managers in a company and found that ideas that were classified as creative came from people who were particularly talented at taking concepts from one division of the company and explaining them to employees in other departments. Burt explained that people connected across groups are more familiar with alternative ways of thinking and behaving. “This is not creativity born of genius, it’s creativity as an import, export business.”
As I listened to this and the rest of the book I decided to do a little more research on Burt’s ideas. On this topic, when people seek out insights from people in different fields, different organizations or of different mindsets, Burt refers to it as “brokerage.” He explains how this can lead to better ideas, improving processes and more. He says, “if you’re charged with innovation, you need to branch out and build brokerage.” “It’s essential. The new ideas we come up with come from the places where we vary. A person who only knows about the variations in what they do will get better at what they’re doing, but will always come to the same place.”
This is exactly where the power of a mastermind group comes from. I recently wrote a post High Performance Mastermind Group, and explained a challenge I had dealt with for some time which I had not found a solution to. But when I had an opportunity to sit with a group of entrepreneurs who were all in very different industries than me, we quickly found a solution to my problem as a group because the others in the group looked at my situation differently and had been through their own challenges in their industries.
Joining a mastermind group allows you to look at each other’s problems and challenges from different perspectives, industries and life experiences. But it also gives you an opportunity to discover things that are holding you back that you were not even aware of. It allows you to be more innovative in your business, your life and your thinking in general.
Join our Elite Performance Mastermind and prepare yourself to take your life and your business to the next level! You will be with an elite group of individuals, from different industries, backgrounds and different areas of the country that will be able to share their brilliance and knowledge with the group while you do the same for them. I’ll also be sharing some powerful tools you can use to give yourself the power to create the future you’ve been dreaming about.
If you don’t own or run your own business, don’t count yourself out. Whatever it is you do, you will do it better after joining this mastermind. You’ll think different. You’ll network. You’ll have the tools to be successful.
Be your best entrepreneur. Be the best manager. Be the best employee. Be the best YOU.